Loading ...1. President Donald Trump and Vice President Marco Rubio are sworn into office.
2. In a rare event on inauguration day, Congress convenes for an
emergency meeting to repeal the Socialist healthcare farce
known as Obama care.
The new Director of Health and Social Services
Dr. Ben Carson announces that an independent group
of healthcare management professionals is hired to
handle healthcare services for poor and low income
people. They are also assigned the duty of eliminating
Medicare and Medicaid fraud. Government’s
costs for public healthcare are reduced by 90%. Healthcare
insurance premiums for working Americans are reduced by 50%.
The move saves billions of taxpayer paid dollars. Healthcare
service in the U.S improves 100%.
3. Newly appointed Department of Homeland Security Chief Ted Cruz
announces the immediate deployment of troops to the U.S.
Mexico border to control illegal immigration and the
immediate deportation of illegals with
criminal records or links to terrorist groups. New
bio-encrypted Social Security IDs are required by every
American citizen. Birthright is abolished. All immigration
from countries that represent a threat to the safety of
American citizens is terminated indefinitely.
The move saves American taxpayers billions of dollars.
Several prisons are closed.
4. Newly appointed Secretary of Business and Economic Development
Carly Fiorina eliminates more than half of the Government
agencies operating under the Obama administration saving
taxpayers billions of dollars. Stocks
rise 100%.
5. Newly appointed Director of
Government Finance Rand Paul announces the abolition of the
IRS and displays a copy of the new Federal Tax Return form.
It consists of one page. The instructions
consist of two pages. The Federal Reserve is audited. The
move saves American Taxpayers billions of dollars and
increases tax revenue.
6. Hillary Clinton is in prison.
Her cell is directly across from Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton who are serving time for “Hate Crimes”.
She bitches at them constantly from behind the bars of her cell in what some call cruel and unusual punishment.
7. Bernie Sanders is in the nuthouse where he belongs. His room is
directly across from Nancy Pelosi, Debbie Wasserman Schultz,
Chris Matthews and Al Franken. They meet for tea every day
at 10 AM and discuss the success and benefits of Communism and Socialism throughout the world.
They also wonder when the Mothership” is going to pick them up and return them to their home planets.
8. Windows 12 is released. It is designed for humans, doesn’t try to
satisfy the needs of every person on the planet, doesn’t
require a degree in nuclear physics to operate and looks
just like Windows 7 except it is easier to use.
9. Barack Obama flees the United States under cover of darkness and returns to his homeland of Kenya before his trial for treason
begins. He deplanes on a remote jungle airstrip. It was
reported that he was last seen wandering through the jungle singing “Hakuna Matata” with a chimp named Commie.
10. Oscar Meyer announces the introduction of a new cholesterol and fat free pepperoni that tastes just like regular pepperoni.
11. Not to be outdone, Kraft Foods announces the introduction of several varieties of cholesterol and fat free cheeses that taste just like regular cheese.
12. A committee is not established to determine what is causing global cooling. Billions of taxpayer dollars are saved.
13. Dead people are no longer allowed to vote in Chicago, a huge blow for the Democrat Party in the State of Illinois.
And this my friends constitutes THE PERFECT DAY